Tuesday, July 22, 2014

How to be Angry Less

(source: imperfectfamilies.com)

I finally have some time between vacations to post, and I've been wanting to talk a little bit about how to prevent anger when you are parenting.  Anger happens to every parent.  Do not feel bad about all the times you've been angry.  It is a hard, tiring, and stressful job and so it happens, and sometimes quite often.  It is important to realize however, that anger is harmful to children....and that we, as parents, should try to discipline and speak to them without anger as much as possible.  Here are some ways to prevent anger and see it rear it's ugly head less and less in your parenting.

1.  Take time for you.  Make sure that you have just a little bit of alone time each day to ponder, meditate, commune with God, or whatever makes you feel peaceful.

2. Take a shower and get dressed.  You will be surprised at how good this makes you feel!  And how you feel will directly influence how you act with your children.

3. Have a schedule where you can feel like your house is in a little bit of order.  Even if it's just one job a day.  Having a sense of order makes you feel better about yourself.

4. Make sure to listen before you jump to conclusions.  Try to believe the best of your children.  Assume they have good intentions.

5. Work on having a good relationship with your spouse.  This will directly impact how you treat the children and how secure they feel.

6. Do the five languages of love with your children, because they will act better and stress you out less.

7. Slow down.  Simplify.  Try not to plan too much in one week so that you feel stressed out all the time.

8.  Wear a pair of tennis shoes.  This seems like silly advice but you'd be surprised how much better you feel when your shoes are comfortable.  And you'll feel like working more and getting more done.

9. Listen to soothing music throughout the day.

10. Give yourself a time out.  When you feel yourself getting stressed or upset.  Go in your bedroom and close the door.  Breathe, count, pray, read, or do whatever it takes to feel calm again.

11. Talk to a friend.  This always reduces stress and makes you feel happy.

12.  Get outside.  Make sure you are getting sunshine every day.  This will really affect your mood.  Also going on outings with the kids gets rid of some of their energy so your house doesn't feel like such a pressure cooker.

13. Take a day off.  Every once in awhile I give myself the day off from chores and read books all day while the kids play around me.  This makes me feel more relaxed.

14. Get away.  Once a year or so, make sure you get away with yourself or your spouse for a short vacation without children, even if it's just for a day.  This really helps your perspective.

15.  Develop a sense of humor!  Laugh about it.  Many things that we take seriously just don't matter that much.  And laughing about it helps to ease tension.

16. Get enough sleep!  Don't forget that things always look better when you've had enough sleep.  Force yourself to go to bed on time!

Hope these tips help!  And I hope you are having a wonderful summer vacation!  I'll try to keep posting in between our trips this summer!  Here is another great article about anger.

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