The first book is very popular, and all I can say is that it's probably because the principles in the book really work! When I read this book and tried it out on my family, the kids went from doing pretty good to doing outstandingly well. This book transformed my family. The title is "The 5 Love Languages of Children" by Gary Chapman,Ph.D. (The book on teens and the one on marriage are also really great).
My next favorite book is written by the co-author of the above book. I'ts called, "How to Really Love your Child," by Ross Campbell, MD.
It was life changing for me. I really learned a lot from it.
And last but not least: My favorite book for helping small children learn to obey. It really does work like magic, and without you having to get angry or yell or whatever you hate about getting kids to obey. I still use it on my teens when I really need to. Although, truthfully, because of the above two books, I rarely have to do more than ask nicely. I'm telling you...the above two books REALLY WORK! The book that I use with my young children to help them learn to obey when they need help though, is called, "1-2-3 Magic," by Thomas Phelan, PhD.
And that's it. These are my parenting bibles. And they work. Try them out! You'll see amazing changes in your family!